Welcome Back- Just about 2 years

Ok... so lets just address the elephant in the room right now. Who is this beautiful child that I see above me. This child is just beautiful.  Who made such a beauty? 

I made her. Well... we made her. She did most of the work. Ok, she did all of the work and I was just there.  I was the first one other human on this earth to touch her head... I was the very first and I can always say that. 

I have a daughter... a little girl. 

and she is just perfect.  

She is my everything and I love her to the ends of the earth. She is the light.. of our lives. Its crazy how something like a kid will do that for you. They always said.. all you need is a kid to truly experience true love. I never really understood. Well now I understand. The baby is the end-all-be-all. 

She has the attitude.. and it I love it and it really annoys me at the same time. 

Wowie Zowie... my life has changed a lot. We moved across the country all the way to Pittsburgh. We had a baby as you can see in the above picture. We bought a house and we are doing some renovations to it.. I became a paramedic and I work for the City of Pittsburgh. HA! They hired me..... a recovering alcoholic and drug addict. I was 100% upfront about everything and it paid off... I got my dream job. 

I don't remember where we were the last time that we talked. Well we will talk more soon. 

These Are The Time

These are the times. The times that I remember how it used to be and I am very thankful for what I have. I am so glad that I have learned the importance of gratitude in my life. It is the foundation for so much of the way that I see things. I can look at something and almost all of the time I can see the positive side in it. I guess that I can see the glass half full.
Right now it is Christmas Eve and I am all alone in my room. Just thinking about all of the gratitude that I have for my life right now. Earlier I was feeling myself slip right into a bad place but I was able to get myself out of it. It is getting easier to do that as time has gone by since my break up.

Sometimes I think that I might just be being way to public about the way that I am dealing with the whole situation. Really, I think that is the right way for me. Sometimes I feel that nobody wants to hear me bitch and moan about it anymore.... but my friends are more then that. They are there for me through thick and thin... or atleast most of them are.

These are the times that I remember and am grateful for my friends and my family. Well... it's time to start my second movie of the evening. It's called Polar Express and I have heard that it is a great holiday movie.
Merry Christmas to all of those that are reading this.... and to all of those out there that are still suffering... I offer my love and prayers for you. I hope to see you soon and share some of my hope with you.

The Brothers..

What a great day to be sober.. today and yesterday.
I don't know if any of you remember last year when my little bother and I went to two baseball games in one day..
Check out last year
 Well, it was so much dang fun that we decided that we were going to be doing it every year. So this baseball season we were both really excited. Its a great chance for us both to just hang out with each other and talk about the things that really matter in both of our lives. Talk about all of the things that are shaping both of our days... Its just a great time to be together.

Like last year we decided that we are going to do it again next year, only this time in Southern California. We are going to be going to a Dodgers ( BOOOOOOOO) game and an Angels (BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO) game.
So that will be really exciting. I love being sober... and having a great brother.

It Could be the Little Things.

It really is the small things in life that are the best. I would have to say that I have been looking forward to this day the most out of any day on my entire trip...and this is something that I would of never of wanted to to before. Unless there was alot of alcohol involved.
Last night i was up at Grant Park in my hometown.. and i was talking with my brother about what Ventura means to us.. and how he wants to raise kids here.. I was thinking that it was a really great place to live. Now I really didnt have Ventura to high on my list during the last 11 years or so.. I really is just because of the place that I was at in my life. I always thought of it in such a bad light. Well I don't anymore... its a good place for family.
I am glad that I am here with my family...

Shit we can tell our grandkids about...

Yesterday was one of the best days that I have ever had in my life. It was one of those days that I will defiantly be telling the next generations about..I got to spend the whole day with my little brother. well he really is only my little brother in age only. He is bigger then I and sometimes he seems like he is a little older in other ways...
We struck out on our journey pretty early in the morning. Our quest was to go to two different baseball games, two different parks, two different leagues, four different teams...all in one day. I had this idea a little while ago and it seemed like a really cool thing to try and do. After we left Monterey...we started to realize that this trip was going to mean a whole lot more then we had thought. I was something that we had never ever heard anyone else talking about..no one else ever doing. It was somethng that we were doing....as brothers.
We had breakfast and then it was on to game one...12:45 start, My team, My cathedral... the San Francisco Giants and AT&T Park, 3rd and King streets in beautiful downtown San Francisco. It was a beautiful day..and the park was, as always, awe inspiring. The Giants ended up losing the game..but it was still great.
Then off to our second stop...my American League team the Oakland Athletics..and the Oakland Coliseum. this stop was going to be a little different though...because we had gotten seats from a friend of ours for this one. and we really didnt know where they were going to be..we knew that they were going to be good...but we didnt know at the begining just how good. They were right behind the plate...not the normal right behind the plate seats..but the "you are closer to the batter then the pitcher" behind the plate seats...the seats that when you are watching the people that usually sit there on tv....you make fun of them but are secretly jealous...those seats. Awesome.
It really gave me a whole new perspective on the game...and a whole new love of it.
The day was awesome...something that we I or my brother will ever forget. It was a great day. I even think that we will start doing it more often...