Sometimes I feel blue. And I am very aware of it. But it really used
to break me. Right in half...and I didn't know how to deal with it. I
knew how to crash and burn. In a bright, brilliant ball of flame. And
how romantic I used to make it all seem. Like it was going to somehow
make me feel better. Only if just for a second. But there was nothing
else behind it. Nothing new to back up my play.
Aleast now there is some hope. Walking to the bus tonight...feeling
kind of blue. But I just have to think about how this feeling used to
just sit on top of me. Like a really heavy wet blanket. And how there
is always tomorrow... And how that makes all of the difference in the
world.
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Keep ur head up love!! Tomorrow bring bigger and better things and i know that God would never let his brigtest star lose his shine<3
ReplyDelete"...it really used to break me...in half....this feeling used to just sit on top of me.....a heavy suffocating blanket.."
ReplyDeleteOh, Richie, what a perfect description. Grandma used to call it, "getting the blues" and she loved listening to those old blues singers. But for me it was as you describe it.......a melancholia so crushing to the spirit that I always assumed it was normal - that everybody felt the same way. I just thought people knew how to handle it - and I didn't. Therefore, I was a bad person, a weakling. Smart, successful, educated people don't get depressed, have the blues, or wear a shroud of gloom day after day...year after year. The feeling used to just sit on top of me like a heavy wet blanket. It used to break me....really break me in half.
Funny that we both were going through the exact same thing...and your description is the first one I have read which totally matches/illustrates my own experience. Thank God there is a word called "hope". Without that sense of faith (that things will be better, tomorrow is a new day) we would have no purpose, or a feeling that we were meant to do something in this life.
Keep on keeping on dude!