Friday, September 6, 2013

Good Place



Today has been one of those days that I can't explain. I really have no words for.. but I am going to try and put something together.

I woke up this morning on the wrong side of the bed. I was just feeling that everything was going wrong. My head hurt and I felt that my heart was not in the right place in my body. I knew what I had to do... I had to say a prayer and see how the day would play itself out.

I posted about my day on Facebook.. hoping to get some sympathy I guess. Sometimes I think that is what I need.... is just a little acknolodgement. I seek these things from other people....

I wrote another blog post... .on another blog that I write..  www.beaconhouse.org/blog and I started thinking about the Big Book and when it gives the example of your daily routine. What you should do in the morning and what you should do when you turn in.

I really don't have a daily routine.. i just kind of let everything go and just let the chips fall as they may. Things are beyond my control.. but I feel that I don't have any idea what is going to happen next. I don't have a lot of skills when it comes to knowing what is going to happen in my day. I know when I have to work and I know when I have to go to school.

I went to Marin and had some coffee and wrote. That is something that I have been trying to do everyday now.. is write about what I feel. A lot like I do when I am writing here.. but it is different. It is more like a journal... and I don't know what it is but I really enjoy the act of physically writing.... and I don't remember it ever being like that before.

When I got home from that... I was in this amazing place. I really couldnt desc
ribe it except for the fact that everything felt right.

I have been reading this book..... called the Untethered Soul. I have only read the first chapter so far but it really made me think..... about the inner dialog that goes on in my head and how that dialog is not me. Disconnecting myself from the dialog is something that I have never thought of before... That realization was something that took me to a really positive place...

I had never even thought of disconnecting myself from that voice.

Things are happening.. exactly the way that they are supposed to be happening and its a beautiful thing.

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