Monday, January 25, 2010

Playing the Tape all the Way Through.



So this is what I had to start my day off with today. A feeling of freedom that I enjoy these days.. Wondering what I would do without it. Sometimes I feel like I am and progressing.. and then there are some days that I think that i am regressing. Like I'm at the same place that I was before, with the only exception being that I'm not drinking.. Yesterday I had a pretty big craving for alcohol after I left work. I wrote about some of the other stuff that had happened that day.. but I really didnt write about the craving that I had.. It was very real. It was the normal everyday reaction that I would of always had back in the day.. alcohol fixes everything. I was driving down the main street in my town... it was pretty late.. on a Sunday.. pissed off and Sunday.
I played the tape out to the end.. and I knew where it would of led me. Right to the end. So that didnt happen.
God provides me with exactly what I need. Because I really have no idea.

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