Sorrow Unmasked

Hey everyone. Here is a quote that I heard a couple of days ago while I was in yoga. I sure do love quotes from people espically when they are inspirational in nature. Some people think that this kind of thing is all sunshine and moonbeams... sparkles and rainbows.  I think about it like this... I feel that these are things that I already know in my heart but I just have not vocalized them yet... and you know what, someone else has.

“Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.”

-Kahlil Gibran

It's As Simple As That

Today was a was not that different then other days that I have had in sobriety. I was inspired by the sights, sounds and feelings that were around me. I was inspired by a piece of music that I had heard in a movie that I had seen the night before. I went to the movie by myself... just the way that I like it sometimes. I will have a link to it below...



The way that it moved my emotions from one end of the spectrum to the other is something that never really happened before. Maybe it did happen... I just don't remember it every happening.

Now it is an essencial part of my life. It helps me to see the beauty and the optimism of the world that its around me. Even when there is ugliness and bitterness throughout it.... sights and sounds such as these are what my life worth living.

Now this is something that happens on the regular if not everyday. Something that I cannot live without  anymore.

Here is a post from the past five years that pretty much says everything that I want to say about the subject. It puts it perfectly.

Friday, November 13, 2009

today

Today is inspirational for me.. I don't know why and I dont really care. All that I know that I feel this way and I never used to.

Small Victories

Sometimes it just takes a little. Sometimes it just takes a little bit to make me feel like I have had a good day. 

I have had a lot of not so good days lately, so today I got a small victory. I can't really describe what it is to you in this blog but lets just say that it is something that elevates a lot of anxiety from my shoulders. 

Tonight I am going to be celebrating by posting this video... but really it is this song that I want you all to hear. I have been getting into a lot of post-rock lately. It is music that makes me very happy and makes me feel inspired.

Four Years.

Hey Everyone...
So yesterday I had 4 years of sobriety... this last year has gone by pretty fast. I had a pretty great day yesterday with friends...
I started this blog to be an essential part of my recovery. I remember early on in my recovery, like 2 weeks in, I wrote down a list of goals. One of them was to start this blog. It took me a little bit of time to do it... but I did. I am glad that I started it... because it will be a written record of how I felt on any given day in my recovery. My blog posts are fewer and farther between... but they sever the same purpose...  To chronicle the way that I am feeling on any given day.
Yesterday was a good day...

Things that I don't need to understand.

I had a really great holiday. I got to see my family and all of the great things that happen when I am with them. I drove almost 800 miles over the course of 3 days, but it was well worth it. The drive was really nice because it gave me a chance to thing about somethings.

There has been a lot of things that have been going on in my life over the past couple of months. Major things have happened to me.... and I am just trying to get somethings sorted in my head. Long drives with great music help... sort things out. 

One of the awesome things that happened while I was down there was me seeing my best friend from high school. There are very few people that I keep in contact with from my days at Ventura High School.... let alone communicate with on a regular basis. Joe is the exception to this rule... we have been in contact pretty much constantly since we graduated high school. He is one of those people that I don't think I will ever not be in contact with over my lifetime. When ever we talk, and we haven't talked in awhile we are right back with each other... like we never missed a beat. He is getting ready to go around the world helping to do good. He is going to be building schools, teaching english, ministering... pretty much anything that needs to be done, he is going to do. Thats the kind of guy that he is. He gave up a really high paying job just to do something that is meaningful. Thats awesome. 

The other thing that is on my mind tonight is something that really throws me off.... Something that really perplexes me. Someone in my past that I love very much decided a couple of months ago just to stop talking to me all together... and I really don't know why. We were in communication with each other and everything was seeming fine, and then just one day.... it stopped. I know that she is ok because she is active on social networks and the such.. she just doesn't want to talk to me. Its just really strange to me, because it has never happened to me before. No one has really ever stopped taking to me all together.... ok, maybe there is someone else out there that doesn't talk to me. I know that I did something wrong with that situation... and i made a amends. 

Well everyone.... thanks for listening. Talk to you soon.
Oh yeah....today is 1400 days clean. 1400! Wow that is nuts. This time 4 years ago I was in a coma... times and attitudes change.... 

today

Today is inspirational for me.. I don't know why and I dont really care. All that I know that I feel this way and I never used to.