Just a couple of things.

This is the place where I get to air things out... right? Well that is what this whole thing started as... a place for me to stretch my wings out with. This is a place for me to be honest about the things that are effecting my sobriety and most importantly of all.. my sobriety.

I went to the hospital today for something that has happened to me before. Something that I first experienced when I was really young. It happened in the middle of the night when I was awoken out of bed to my mother screaming at the top of her lungs. I had no idea what was happening but I found out later that she was passing a kidney stone. I never forgot the pain that was present in her voice that night.

Well, fast forward to me just about one month ago when I experienced my very first kidney stone. It was really small but it was one of the worst things that I have ever experienced before. I remember thinking that I hoped that I wouldn't have to experience a bigger one. I did not want to feel the way that my mom did. I do not do very well with that kind of pain.

I woke up this morning and that feeling of pain was back again. I decided that I was going to urgent care but really did not know if I was going to make it to the hospital in my car. I was not doing very well but I ended up making it.

What I am trying to get at is that I was prescribed pain-killers for the first time in my recovery. I have done what I was supposed to do. I told the doctor that I was someone that was in recovery and that I used to have a problem with things of this nature. I was so afraid of the pain coming back that I took the prescription. I talked to my sponsor about it and I have put it out there to the world. That is all that I really wanted to do here.

In other news... while I was walking through the hospital I saw a woman coming down the hall in a wheelchair with a brand new baby... and that baby was screaming! I though that it was one of the most amazing things that I had seen in a long time. No matter what I was feeling at that moment in regards to my pain I just had to acknowledge the true beauty in that moment.