Thursday, January 31, 2013

Adventures Await...

I am going on a new adventure tomorrow and I am pretty excited about it. Even if it does not work out I will consider it a success and chalk it up to experience.

I am going to take a class tomorrow about something that is very interesting to me. Really it doesnet matter what the class is all about its really about getting out there and doing something that I want to do. There has always been a lot of fear that has surrounded doing things like this for me in the past.
It really would only take the smallest thing for me to just shut down and not experience something new for myself.

This year has been really good to me so far. This is only going to make it better... another experience that I can build on. I will let you all know how it went tomorrow.

Monday, January 28, 2013

Whole Hearted.



So this is what I wanted to do with my day. Just take a second and record something that really speaks to my heart. Something that really makes my heart just smile.

I spent the greater part of the day in a doctor's office answering questions and getting tests ran on me. The entire time that I was in the doctor's office I knew that I was going to going downtown and take some pictures of the sunset against the skyline of the City. I had the spot picked out because I had gone there before but did not have my camera to record what I was seeing. I had my phone but it just was not good enough. The picture above was taken without a tripod. I have not idea how I kept the camera still.

I have somethings on the horizon that I have been thinking about for a long time. These feelings of purpose that have been at the back of my mind. They just had not taken form yet. I know that there are big things ahead. I can't tell you about them yet because I have a fear of telling people about my big plans and when I don't follow through people thing that I am just talk.

I am more then just talk. I am going to speak with my whole heart.

Oh.. and if you have not see in this TED talk from Brené Brown you really should. I will talk about it a little bit more in the future.

Have you ever just wanted to........

Quit your job and just be without a job for awhile.

I know that there are people out there that would think that I am crazy for even thinking about this. There are so many people out there that do not have jobs or are having a very hard time finding them. I understand this. I have been working really non-stop since I was 15 years old.

I have a friend that saved up a bunch of money and then just quit her job because it was not moving her forward in life. It was not adding anything to her life except the paycheck and a headache. She was in the same business that I am in.  Just talking to her was very inspiring to me because I see so many people around me that do just that. They can just change things on a whim and move in another direction. I know that I am that kind of person. I know that there is something else that is out there for me when it comes to making my living.

I have another friend that used to be a bartender in San Francisco and is now photographing weddings and travel layouts for big magazines in Vietnam. How cool is that? These are people who are following there passions.

Then I think to myself.... at least I am starting to explore some of these things for myself. I have started to progress and do things that I have always wanted to do but was always to scared to do.

Part of me is very comfortable where I am right now because I can live how I want to.... and then the other part of me knows that there is something richer out there for me. Something that I would never ever experience in my comfortable world.

Tonight just got my mind thinking and moving. I love that. I love hanging out with people that are thought provoking. Those are the kind of people that I want to be around.

I love my friends... and I love my life.

Saturday, January 26, 2013

Just a couple of things.

This is the place where I get to air things out... right? Well that is what this whole thing started as... a place for me to stretch my wings out with. This is a place for me to be honest about the things that are effecting my sobriety and most importantly of all.. my sobriety.

I went to the hospital today for something that has happened to me before. Something that I first experienced when I was really young. It happened in the middle of the night when I was awoken out of bed to my mother screaming at the top of her lungs. I had no idea what was happening but I found out later that she was passing a kidney stone. I never forgot the pain that was present in her voice that night.

Well, fast forward to me just about one month ago when I experienced my very first kidney stone. It was really small but it was one of the worst things that I have ever experienced before. I remember thinking that I hoped that I wouldn't have to experience a bigger one. I did not want to feel the way that my mom did. I do not do very well with that kind of pain.

I woke up this morning and that feeling of pain was back again. I decided that I was going to urgent care but really did not know if I was going to make it to the hospital in my car. I was not doing very well but I ended up making it.

What I am trying to get at is that I was prescribed pain-killers for the first time in my recovery. I have done what I was supposed to do. I told the doctor that I was someone that was in recovery and that I used to have a problem with things of this nature. I was so afraid of the pain coming back that I took the prescription. I talked to my sponsor about it and I have put it out there to the world. That is all that I really wanted to do here.

In other news... while I was walking through the hospital I saw a woman coming down the hall in a wheelchair with a brand new baby... and that baby was screaming! I though that it was one of the most amazing things that I had seen in a long time. No matter what I was feeling at that moment in regards to my pain I just had to acknowledge the true beauty in that moment.

Blast off. #sfcitylife #sfcitynitelife



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Under the Bridge. #sfcitylife



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Thursday, January 24, 2013

I Live Here. #sfcitylife #goldengate



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Sunday, January 20, 2013

Friday, January 18, 2013

Oh pretty. #sfcitylife #prettycity



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Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Walking. #neon #sfcitylife



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Home. #myhouse #goaltender #sfcitylife



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Ready to go. #sfcitylife



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Sunday, January 13, 2013

Life Decisions. Big and Small

So.... I had the most amazing time with my friend Joe yesterday. I don't even know where it is that I want to start, but it has to be somewhere.
Every time that I talk to this guy I leave the encounter completely inspired and energized. That is the way that I want to feel when I leave my friends and the people that I love. There are the people that I want to surround myself with.
As I am getting older I realize that I really do not have time for the people that will not bring this to the table. I just don't have time for it.

Ok... got a little off of the subject that I started to write about in the first place. We talked about what effect that we want to have on this world.

He told me that he had figured out an amazing way to think about work.... he calls it "fundraising". I think that this is brilliant. We are basically fundraising for the important things in our lives that can have maximum impact on others by working. I am in love with it.

Here is another song that is just blowing my mind right now.

Saturday, January 12, 2013

Friday, January 11, 2013

Rows and Rows. #sfcitylife



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Friends for Life

Today is going to be a good day. I am going to hang out with my friend Joe. We have known each other since high school and I am really excited to see him. Do you have one of those friends that you know that you will be in touch with for the rest of your life? When you do see each other it is like no time has gone by since your last meeting. That's the way that it is with us and I really don't have too many people that I can say that about.
He just we around the world and did a whole a lot of good for a lot of different people. Here is a link to his blog about the entire trip.
http://joewishon.theworldrace.org

Its going to be a good day to just catch up with him and talk about what he has gone through.

I have a whole lot of respect for him for the decisions that he has made. Doing things based on heart and not the pocket book. I am trying to move closer to that and I think that I have made a whole lot of progress.

Here is a song that has hit me right between the eyes and I wanted to share it with all of you. It's another one from Moonlit Sailor. Enjoy.

Thursday, January 10, 2013

SFMTA #sfcitylife



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