Start from the beginning.

So today is where the healing will start from. This is the day.

I am going to have to grieve a bit though... so maybe the healing has not started yet. No matter what I think that today was a very big step for me.

I said goodbye to the person who I was in love with. I am still in love with. It will take me sometime to not be able to say that. This person meant so much to me that everything that I was envisioning for myself in the future revolved around her. That may not be healthy... but it sure is warm and comfortable. I really like the way that it felt too.... Knowing that someone was there for you and had your back.

Well things can change in that way... and when they change, the change can show you what is really important in my life. When all of this came down on my head tonight I started to get text messages from all kinds of friends in my life. That made me feel warm and comfortable in a whole different way.

Someone that I have met and hang out with a couple of times sent me something that really hit me hard... I will share it here.

“This is the beginning of a new day. You have been given this day to use as you will. You can waste it or use it for good. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever; in its place is something that you have left behind…let it be something good.” Author Unknown

It is exactly what I need to hear... and I think this is exactly where I am supposed to be. It is a very uncomfortable place, but it is where my life is taking me. 

So I will go to bed.... very emotionally exhausted and with a throughly broken heart... but knowing that this is what the start looks like.